I Feel Insulted...

Given my long period of unemployment, checking the mail has become a dreaded task. My funds are completely dry and I'm getting bills I can't pay. It just makes me feel worse and worth less than my currently negative worth.  Imagine my surprise when I open my mailbox and I have one of those perforate envelopes that says, "CHECK ENCLOSED."

I have no idea who this Shoplet.com company is or why they would be sending me money. Is this a class-action settlement? Are they giving me money to spend with them? I open it and see that it's for a whole $5.00.

I have no idea if to feel pathetic or not because I kind of peaked up at this, but I did.  So, now I need to see who they are and why I've gotten this.

Ah hell.

You know, I remember over a decade ago getting one of these, but for a loan.  It was substantially larger by about 1000 times.  

I was desperate for money, but I wasn't stupid enough to take out a damned loan, even though I was employed.

This check is just to enroll me in their so-called credit protection program. I don't know which is worse, that they were offering me so little to scam me, or that I was all excited at the whole $5.00.